When Los Altos Hills resident Neerja Raman arrived in New York City from India in 1970, she didn’t know anyone in the United States. Soon after enrolling at Stony Brook University, she asked fellow students which books they were reading in an effort to connect with them.
“I had to figure out how to … relate to these kids and I had always been a big believer in books,” Raman said. “So I asked around and said, ‘What are the 10 books these kids read in high school?’ – and I read them all.”
Years later, during her career in IT, Raman began writing books. Her fourth book, “The Chemistry of Belonging: Stories of Inheritance and Upbringing,” was published in January.
The memoir follows the story of Raman and her family’s journey in post-independence India, exploring cultural complexities, social justice and family values. Despite focusing on her family’s experiences in India, Raman said her story resonates with global audiences, including a writing buddy based in the deep South.
“At the human level, (my book buddy) could totally relate to me … so it’s about the values,” Raman said. “I think that’s what the book talks about, is what your inheritance and upbringing is. If you get those values, then you can be happier in life and have strength in your own identity.”
Raman wrote her first book, “The Practice and Philosophy of Decision Making: A Seven Step Guide,” 22 years ago. During the COVID-19 pandemic, Raman said she took her writing career more seriously and that led her to write two fictional books before this year’s memoir.
Raman said her mother’s passing in 2006 and her grandchildren’s interest in their heritage inspired her to write the “Chemistry of Belonging.”
“My grandkids are very fascinated by (my mother),” Raman said. “Like my granddaughter will ask me, ‘Who’s your mommy, who’s your mommy?’ and I realized how, … really they have no exposure, especially the cultural aspects of (our past).”
Raman said she made sure the memoir covered aspects of her entire family’s life, while keeping herself as the point of continuity.
“It wasn’t a book about me, yet I was the continuing factor,” Raman said. “The values we inherit, the choices we make and the strength we find – that’s what the book is really about.”
Raman hopes that her book not only provides cultural continuity for her grandchildren, but Generation Z overall. She also hopes it resonates with many others.
“Well, I did target (Gen Z),” Raman said. “My book is pretty universal, both from an Indian perspective as well as a global perspective.”
Though nervous about sharing her family’s story at first, Raman said she began to feel better about the progression of the book with each chapter she wrote. Every chapter is its own individual story, yet contributes to the overall narration, she added.
“It was truly, actually fun in a way,” Raman said. “It’s like programming. Suddenly, when it falls into place, it falls into place. I had bits and pieces already.”
“The Chemistry of Belonging” is available on Amazon at tinyurl.com/yeypyv6w.
